I was all set to call shenanigans on a claim that I read recently. The claim was that Burritos & Beer has burritos that are on par with the ones you will find on the West Coast. Insert the sound of a record scratching to a halt, because that is one strong claim. I grew up in Los Angeles — burrito country. I have high standards when it comes to burritos. Some would say too high. Lettuce don’t belong in a burrito. Sour cream doesn’t belong on or in a burrito. Queso? I don’t even know what that is exactly. Sauce? If you pour sauce over a burrito, you no longer get to call it a burrito — you’ve turned it into an enchilada.
Burritos & Beer doesn’t seem like a place where you would find a good burrito. It’s set up Chipotle style, where you get to pick and choose what you want. Too much variety is usually a recipe for disaster, because when left to their own devices, most people won’t choose in their best interest.
So let me tell you how to order a good burrito from Burritos & Beer, because you can’t be trusted to do it without futzing it up.
1. They will ask you what kind of rice you want, and you will say white.
2. They will ask you what kind of beans you want, and you will say refried.
3. Your only two options now are vegetarian or carnitas.
a) If you choose vegetarian, add mixed cheese to your burrito, and THAT’S IT. Stop right there.
b) If you choose carnitas, then they will add a hot, juicy, heaping pile of shredded pork, and you will smile inside because that is what carnitas are supposed to look like: shredded and juicy. They will ask you if you want anything else on your carnitas burrito, and you will say mixed cheese and pico de gallo, and THAT’S IT. Have them wrap up your burrito quickly before you go crazy and ask for corn or guacamole or some other thing that doesn’t belong in a burrito.
There — now you know how to order a good burrito from Burritos & Beer. Go forth and be happy.